It's snowing and my love for you keeps growing.

I have lived in Utah for five years now.  I am not a native to the state, or in fact to the States at all.  I am an English lady living across the pond in the welcoming wild west.   When I first moved here, it was a very difficult transition to say the least.  I have since acclimatized (some what – depending on the day in question).   Something I have never really admired is the snow.  Today, I think that is changing.

The snow started falling outside my house at 6:30 am. The exact time stuck with me because I was walking to my car when the weather changed.  Within minutes the tiny particles falling from the sky no longer had the projectile like force of sleet.  They simple drifted down.  One tiny flake landed on my right eyelash.  In that moment the vision in that eye went from LASIK obtained 20/20 to a sort of 1970’s wedding filter glow. In that moment, I fell in love.  I realized that snow has a sort of comforting effect.  It’s magic turned my cold heart of hatred into a warm feeling of appreciation. 

I don’t know I can promise that I will never again say that I hate snow.  I can say that today, my love for snow, and for Utah grew just that little bit more. 

Just another ordinary day.

It's not like anyone reads these anyway...so honesty here I come

I am going to pre-emt this post with the following statement: I am tired of constantly reading the rosy tinted spectacle style posts permeating the internet. I just want to be incredibly real.  My life is not a constant barrage of moments that will induce "LIKES".  Sometimes, it requires starting your day with a bowl of fruit loops and instagraming the lonely loop that's left in the bowl (because it some how understands how you feel.)

I woke up this morning to some fantastic news.  My brother and his fabulous wife are pregnant, again!  I think it is such a blessing to have such wonderful nieces and nephews. (Even if sadly, I only get to see them once a year.) I love being 'Auntie Anne'.  While I am so incredibly excited for the addition to my extended family, my heart breaks just a little that I STILL have not had a baby of my own.  (Four years in the trying and counting - a tiny amount of time compared to some people but an eternity for the worlds most impatient girl). I'll admit, I feel incredibly selfish confessing this.  I will proceed with my confession none the less. 

Every time I see my friends beautiful babies, I simply think, "Man, I am a failure. I can't do that.  I can't make one of those."  My husband tells me not to worry about it.  I remind him, that is pretty much the same as telling me not to breath.

Why am I sharing all this?  There has to be someone else who knows what this feels like.  Maybe I think sharing it will some how make it easier?  Maybe I think if I can put it into the universe, I can some how let it go.  Who the hell knows.

I am putting it out there though.  The frustrating thing is that for so long I have tried to pass it off like I don't care.  Saying, "It will happen when it's meant to." But behind closed doors I am constantly researching what I need to do to make it happen.  I have done the obvious to the bizarre. If there is a recommendation out there, yup, guaranteed, I've tried it.

What is most tiresome is the need to constantly find an excuse or reason why it still has not happened.  Sigh. I am not looking for pity. Or advice.  I promise you I have already heard it all.  I KNOW, I KNOW...when I stop worrying it will happen.

I guess I just want to say in response to the friend, who upon announcing she was expecting, asked, "Have you ever thought about having kids?"  Yup, sure.  I have.

Work by my talented students

So i have started a blog to showcase the work by my art students in the community art class i teach.  ENJOY! I am so proud of them.

artists dont color inside the lines BLOG

anthro online gallery

OK we all know I love anthro but I am particularly in love with their online gallery.

Anthro Online Gallery

Check it out!

I love the work of Natalie Lété.

Finally...some up!

This is a poster I made using an image I created of my grandmother, Reita Newport Wellington.  I am really into the idea of capturing my 'English' roots right now. I have started a 'altered' book project to collect all my ideas regarding it.  But when I think about England, I think about my Nanna.

Why Documenation?

I am coming to realize more and more that my art is based around the idea of documentation. That being said, isn't all art some form of documentation.  Well - I guess for me an exploration as to who I am.  I have always joked that I am a walking contradiction.  I mean, I am English with out even a hint of an english accent...and that's just the start.  So, I guess I am trying to explore or expose who I am.  Not in a philosophical approach but more of a literal one.  I often wonder if I could leave only one thing behind for others to find in years to come, what document would I want it to be.  I hope my art will fall into that category. 


I guess all this being said, I document so I feel like I am making a difference somehow.  Or that the world is impacting me in a worthwhile way. 

Today is the day...or at least I think it is.

So I figure for this thing to work, I need to set myself some deadlines.  I am going to upload 5 pieces of my work today and start my first two inch square. There. I have set the goal.  Place your bets. 2:1 I do it.
- After reading this over I will set the goal of 3 pieces.  That's more likely.

OK - so I never got as far as to doing it.  But my goal still remains. 

Question: How can you be an artist and go to school, work, volunteer etc?  Please let me know.